“Devoid of junkies, beggars, and single mothers I felt cheated out of the sinister edge I’d been promised,” reveals writer Paul Breen.
The published author had been visiting Middlesbrough to watch his team Charlton play at The Riverside recently.
But, rather than the sterotypes he’d imagined, the Londoner was left shocked at what the town had to offer.
His words appeared in a blog post entitled An Afternoon on the Edge of England on Amy Lord’s tenpennydreams.
Here we publish extracts of his thoughts on the town:
The arrival
“Last Saturday I went on a blind date, a meeting arranged as a consequence of football – Charlton Athletic versus Middlesbrough. My date was with the town itself, a place that gets an awful lot of bad press, and has been described as Britain’s worst town. I was going there early in the morning to spend the day sightseeing, and then go to The Riverside in the afternoon to see the football.”
“I do apologise in hindsight for believing some of the media portrayals, I was half-afraid of what I’d find up there."
"If you believed the stereotypes, she’d [my date] would be a chain smoking single mother from a boarded up council estate. She’d be dressed in a shell suit, and be surprised that anyone lived in a world beyond the Tees.
"That, of course, was if I could see her through the endless haze of smog, or get past the junkies and beggars in the streets around the station which sounded like some sort of pre-tourism Amsterdam.”
Eve Micklewright 
Middlesbrough College and Transporter Bridge
Transporter alone was worth the visit
“I came upon Middlesbrough College which seemed to be having an open day, and would have been worth a visit if I wasn’t in a hurry, having limited time.
"I work in education, and this looked a place worthy of exploration. But it was that or looking at the shiny blue structure of the Transporter bridge, which again was worth far more of a visit all on its own.
“This working bridge across the River Tees stands like a sculpture on the edge of the docks, framing a picture of industry in the gaps between its angles and cables. Again its imposing figure speaks of heritage and history, and fascinating stuff to discover.
“Heading back into town past the bridge once more I found a high street as ordinary as anything in Kent, Essex, Enniskillen, or Glasgow. Devoid of junkies, beggars, and single mothers I felt cheated out of the sinister edge I’d been promised. Maybe the David Lynch exhibition in the Middlesbrough Institute of Modern Art (MIMA) would give me a sense of the dark undercurrent I’d been expecting.”
Statue of Brian Clough at Albert Park.
Tree-lined pathways and Cloughie
“Setting off down the road I missed the turn though and ended up in Albert Park, a good fifteen minutes walk away. There I discovered tree-lined pathways where people walked their dogs and children played on the benches close to the statue of one of the town’s best known sons. Brian Clough, football star and manager, appears at the entrance of the park with his boots slung over his shoulder, and not a single delinquent within reach of his famous sharp tongue.”
“By this stage I’m starting to form a theory about Middlesbrough, my date for the afternoon. It’s like a place I know in Australia – Machan’s Beach, a beautiful secluded suburb on the north coast where they have a notorious crocodile who keeps away visitors. Maybe Middlesbrough’s the same – create a false impression, put up an unflattering profile picture and keep the visitors away!”
“As I made my way into the Dorman Museum at the edge of the park, I’d seen nothing so far to put me off this town. Getting inside the museum, I did have one regret – that I hadn’t longer to explore this pearl of history if I also wanted to see the Mima gallery."
Vince Hopson 
Middlesbrough's Cenotaph and The Dorman Museum.
The public art
“But I was desperate to find mima and set off on my travels again, to where I found swans and a 30 foot sculpture of the ‘Bottle of Notes’ designed by Claes Oldenburg and Coosje van Bruggen, Swedish and Dutch artists respectively."
"Added to the sight of the Transporter Bridge and the Giant Butterfly Net along the docks, this has to be one of the most interesting sights of Middlesbrough.”
Joseph Hanson 
Temenos at Middlesbrough
There was so much left to see
“Middlesbrough, as I made my way back to the Riverside, wasn’t a day spent killing time in the company of somebody straight off the set of Benefits Street.
"It was actually an afternoon that I was sad to see the end of, because there was so much that was still left to see.
"This was a city with culture and a pride in its own heritage – more of a factory worker who goes to the theatre on weekends than slob who watches the Jeremy Kyle show, and that in itself is a terrible stereotype perpetuated by a media that doesn’t look below the surface.”
“Going back to my blind date analogy, the best compliment I can pay the town is that if Middlesbrough were a woman my wife would have been awfully jealous when I got back to London because I never stopped talking about her the whole of Sunday!”
- Paul Breen is an Irish author from London who supports Charlton Athletic. You can visit his personal website or follow him on Twitter @CharltonMen
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